Magic Mike Live comes to Australia

Eddie B: I think I offended a mum with strippers

Was it something I said? More likely, something I did. It's tricky to navigate a new group of friends especially when that group of friends is a Mothers' Group.

Initially, the only thing you have in common is birth. You all had sex around the same time and then turned up puffing and panting to the same hospital around the same time and voila, you're suddenly mates.

At least, that's how it worked for me. I have landed myself the absolute best Mothers' Group. Our very first meeting was interrupted by a fire alarm. We all had to abandon our prams and evacuate out the fire exit, clutching our four-week-old babies. We ended up bonding outside, breastfeeding in the gutter and using the sidewalk as a change table. It was an inauspicious start.

A month later COVID hit and we had to shift our first tentative get-togethers online. Every week since, we have caught up one way or another and are in constant contact. We have been there for each other through thick and thin, and I'm not just talking about nappy consistency.

Channing Tatum in Magic Mike.
Channing Tatum in Magic Mike.

All of us have endured the turbulence of 2020 and formed some beautiful, lasting friendships.

Until this week, that is. On Tuesday, one member unceremoniously left the group WhatsApp. There was no so long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye, just gone, and I think it's my fault.

You see, I scored some tickets to Magic Mike and I immediately thought of the girls. Well, immediately I thought of the boys but my next thought was how much the girls would like the boys. Who doesn't like a dance troupe of scantily clad gents doing their best impression of Channing Tatum? Evidently, not everyone.

After a flurry of enthusiastic thumbs up, the next message was "XXX has left the group". In the scheme of horrific Mothers' Group stories, this really pales in comparison. Some mums just don't gel with the concept. They find themselves in an unsupportive environment, it reminds them of forced group activities at school or they'd rather just not have to listen to other women's horrific birth stories. Fair enough.

It's one less ticket to Magic Mike and more cheap champagne to go around. If you happen to be in the audience, keep an eye out for my Mothers' Group. We'll be the ones on our first big night out - on the table or under the table. Cheers to that.

Originally published as Eddie B: I think I offended a mum with strippers


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